Do you enjoy vomiting? Then by all means I highly recommend reading this ad for The Playboy Club featured on The Hairpin and obviously meant to imitate a blog-y tone.
I think my favorite part is, “Ladies, if you’ve always wanted a TV show that you and your guy could watch—and actually enjoy—together, it’s finally here.”
FINALLY. Every time I’m like, “Hey guy, wont you come and watch my favorite show about pink ribbons and cupcakes with me?” and Ben is all, “Hey lady, I will but only if there’s a lot of tits and ass,” I just WISH SO HARD for a show that can bridge this tragic gender gap.
It’s like Mad Men meets something way shittier than Mad Men.
Oh my, I have always wished there were some television show my man and I could watch together without one of us wanting to dump the other for somebody with some fucking taste! I’m very picky: for me, it’s serious historical dramas with tons of sex in them or nothing. So, basically, the Tudors. It’s so great! I love it when someone does something, and the one guy goes “IMMA KINGGUH ENNGWANNNNN!” which is important because sometimes people forget he is the mildly retarded king of England. So historical! And then usually they cut to a picture of someone’s ass, in case you’re getting bored from all the history.
Anyway, my guy doesn’t like the Tudors because it is set in England and all the women being degraded by systemic sexism have weird accents. So this show sounds perfect!!! I won’t have to worry about him telling me to dress up as the fictional characters he wishes he could have sex with, because whenever he’s drilling away, I’ll shut my eyes and imagine that he’s Eddie Cibrian, who plays an attorney. I love (or hate) him soooooo much!
The best part is that when I come home with yet another case of the Mondays, it turns out there are television shows I can watch! Why did I never think of this before? Nothing makes me feel better about the weekly return to workaday drudgery than sitting motionless on a couch for an hour while glamorous, powerful, sexy, murdering mobsters and women dressed like shiny gymnasts teach me about American history and culture.